i came back to lunch to a note on my desk alerting me to the fact that i had a package waiting for me. i tried to rack my brain to figure out what it was. i mean, i didn’t remember ordering anything but i have the memory of a goldfish with alzheimer’s so who knows?
i walked into the reception area, see the biggest arrangement of flowers i have ever seen and my stomach immediately drops
to rewind and give a little background information:
bottle service dude texted me last week asking me out. i was in the middle of something else and figured i would respond later and it just completely slipped my mind [again, memory of a goldfish] it wasn’t an intentional snub or me pulling a fade away since if i was going to break up with him i would have done it in person. in fact, my mother and sister had counseled me to give BSD another chance saying having things in common is overrated blah blah, if i actually want to get over sideburns i need to work at it with other people blah blah
my boss was standing nearby sees the flowers, sees me and immediately starts cracking up yelling “I THOUGHT YOU BROKE UP WITH HIM!!” i couldn’t have been a darker shade of red and i begged her to tell me they were from someone else.
no such luck
my boss found the whole situation hysterical and as people walked by marveling i was dying of embarrassment wondering who on earth sends flowers to someone when they didn’t respond to your text?
was this some sort of grand romantic gesture? a way to get my attention?
i wanted to die as my boss paraded through the office carrying the flowers back to my office space
everyone else thought it was the funniest thing ever, i just found it embarrassing
we opened the box and oh hey, there is also a teddy bear! and what do you know? there is also a note!
the note read: hi danielle. hope you like the flowers. sorry if i came off a little strong or acted like a jerk. good luck on the marathon and i hope you get a job in oregon!
-bottle service dude
welp. so…apparently he found my little corner of the internet. pretty sure i can thank his roomie for that.
honestly, i am so confused by the whole thing. was this him genuinely him being sweet saying no worries, good luck with your life? he’s one of the nicest guys so maybe? or is it a really expensive eff you? if that was the case it would have been hilarious to send a barbershop quartet breaking up with me no?